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Tuesday, December 30, 2008

What mind may speak of

My mind is a world of many things
What’s true, what’s real, what’s ideal

What lies only in dreams or in reality
What I care and don’t, what’s insanity

Tickle my fancy, why don’t you
With all the simple things, what say you

May it be wind or snow or hail
Hoping that my strive will prevail

Don't let it all remain in disarray
So lie beside me and stay ...

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Selfish

Selfish
When you tell me you love me
While you still love somebody else
At the same time
Selfish
When you call me in the middle of the night
Saying hello, you miss me
While you still miss her
Selfish
When you dream of me sometimes
Even though I told you not to
And then you dream of her
Selfish
When you asked to be mine
When you are still hers
Selfish
When you hold me in your mind
But you’re holding her in reality
Selfish
When you want to kiss me
But you’re kissing her instead
Selfish
When you pour your heart out to me
Then tell me it’s all a big joke
Selfish
Has a name
It’s you
And it’s me

Sorry

Sorry
I can’t seem to please you all the time
Sorry
I never meant to hurt you in any way
Sorry
I tend to misunderstand when you say
Hurtful words that
pierce
straight through
my heart
Severing my brain
Of its usual function
So I’m sorry
For all the wrongdoings
For the silent resentments
Let there be just peace
From now on
Between you and I

Drug

You’re a drug
Addiction of a kind
As one’s said, a personal brand

Numbing my senses
Triggering my hunger
Oh so appetizing
And I search for defences
As
Abstinence activates indulgence
And but I know that I
Need to get my mind off you

A drug, you are to me
Need to rid of you, I see
Though still, I’ll long for you
All over again
Sooner or later
Then I’ll hate you again

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Spirit

Don’t tell me it’s all too late
Is it not better than never?
Don’t tell me I live to die
When too many are dying to live
Don’t tell me there’s nothing more
It’s not the end
Maybe we have to die few times to really live
And to
Find the spirit to keep moving on
… … …
It’s all easier said than done
But slowly, that spirit come
All should end well
It has to
It has to

Friday, December 26, 2008

A Moment Alone

The music tickles my ears
Drowsiness kicking in
My eyes fail to keep open
My soul’s leaving me alone here

Stand

Stand by me
When no one else does
Hold my hand
Through it all
Tell me it’ll be alright
Above all odds
Help me walk again
Whenever I’ve crumbled
Make me believe I’ll make it through
All the earthquakes and being lost
And find my way
to the end

Judgement

Good for nothing
Yes, you are
Uncomfortable
Yes, you are
You feel you’re trapped
In a world that passes you by
You feel stupid just because
You know the things you should’ve done
But didn’t do
You avoid people just to be alone
You try to figure things out on your own
And others tend to misjudge
Misunderstand, misinterpret
You don’t seem to know yourself anymore
Riding a carousel that never seem to end
And you’re deteriorating, inside, slowly
And you choose to fight

Monday, December 22, 2008

Thinking

that someday,
when dreams do come and seep in through my blinds,
seems so far away,
maybe that someday,
will come my way,
or not yet,
i'll have to wait,
patience is so bitter,
waiting and waiting,
drives me insane,
it's easier said than done...
what is it this time
never think that it'd be too far gone?
spinning inside my head
headlights from the cars surrounding
here i am, silently contemplating
and still wishing for someday
that someday to come
i'll fly away to someplace far away
not like now, spinning around in circles
whatever

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Puzzled

i sank deep into the dark
but now i'm trying to pull myself back
out into the reality that stings
so that i won't lose everything

so many labyrinths and puzzles
it gave me a fright it left me in pieces
gnawing through into my core
all these words coming from you

again and again and again
you pour salt into the open wounds
would somebody take me away
and leave all this to yesterday

Twisted

The sun sunk below the horizon.
Shouldn’t let sorrow drowned me further
But my stomach twisted in discomfort
As my mouth tasted bitter

The night sky holds the silver moon
Shining all through the night
But would you bring a moon to my sky soon?
There’s nothing but darkness in sight


I can’t sleep maybe I don’t want to
Thoughts running through my head
And things I don’t care to do
Adventures far away I long for instead

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Drive me crazy

No one notices it
No one seems to care
Even if they do
They don’t know what to do
And those that need to understand
Notice it in such misinterpretation
That it gives birth to nothing but miseries
Try to make them understand, anyone?
Try to make them see more than what they like to see
‘cause as far as I am concerned, it’s driving me crazy.

Down Cycle

So it started with just a little taste
That ended up finishing a meal
And sometimes even more.
Each day your mood was swinging
Misery and anxiety often kicks in.
Little criticisms or even conversation
Leave your self in disorientation.
Then you taste it again
So you’re calmer, feeling better.
But oh it lasts
Only for few minutes, even seconds,
So you’re back to feeling down again
And the cycle continues…
Till when? Not sure when.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Darkness

Show me how to breathe now
‘Cause I suffocate, disintegrate

And you can’t see me other than
The one you don’t really like.
You have visions of me that
Leave you blind to the real me, just me

Show me how to be me again
‘Cause I see darkness as a friend
The morning exhausts me
The night looks so much brighter
But I know, I’m too far gone in the dark
That I lost my way to come back
I want to reach out, but there’s nothing
The dark is still all I see.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Ephemeral

Hurt me, scratch me, don’t miss
Pierce me, this thick thin dermis
Choke me, don’t release me
Mark a red hand on me for me to see
Drown what’s around me, let me blind
Just hold me again, leave all behind

Evil Angel

Inspired/Excerpts from “Evil Angel” Breaking Benjamin

Hold it together
But it’s falling apart, dying, as
Nothing but lies and crooked wings
Clouds my visions, linger in my mind
I don’t have the answer
I have questions
To find faith inside of me

But, you…
Leave me to die here?
Help me survive here?

Put me to sleep, evil angel
Fly over me, evil angel
Why can’t I breathe, evil angel?

So hide the betrayal
And ignore the denial
Digging a nail into my skin
Pouring salt to the open wounds
Try to float as I drown
Hoping to find a saviour

Fly over me, evil angel
Help me to breathe, evil angel